Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Always and forever, our angel you'll be!

It's almost been four weeks since one of my dearest neighbors passed away. Actually, let me rephrase that...she's more of a sister than a neighbor. Her name is Cheryl. I have never lost someone so close to me like this and it hasn't been anything but hard. Although, she's not with us now, I know that she is rocking our world up in heaven!

Have you ever met a person that can literally light up a room and put a smile on your face?  Someone that can love you unconditionally without judgement? Someone who can make you laugh and forget about all of your problems? Someone that can show you how to not set limits for yourself? Someone who can reassure you that everything will be alright?....these things explain Cheryl's characteristics so well. She was not only an inspiration to the whole community, but she was a huge role model for me and the one's who spent time with her.

To tell you a little bit about my relationship with Cheryl it started out when I was born! Haha, of course! She was about 20 years older than me and has been my neighbor ever since I was born. Coach T and Pat (Cheryl's parents) are considered a third set of grandparents to me. They have seen me grow up and have supported a lot of the things I do in life. I love them dearly! Growing up with Cheryl, I will be honest, I did not know how to act towards her: she was handicap. Many look at this as a negative thing, but it wasn't at all. As I got older, I realized that it didn't matter if she was handicap. She taught me a lot about myself and how to accept others because of that.

I grew up 'babysitting' Cheryl around my early teen years. Playing wheel-of-fortune, listening to 92.9 'The River' and watching movies laying on her bed upside were some of her favorite things to do. One of my fondest memories while being there was when it got close to bedtime, I would be in the front room watching television (keep in mind the front room is pretty much on the opposite side of the house, nowhere near Cheryl's bedroom.) Low and behold, I could hear her snoring away alllll the way in the front room with the TV on...that's usually when I knew she was definitely asleep. :)

As I got older, being around Cheryl became more of a privilege to me. That sounds awkward, but I feel like a lot of people missed out on getting to know her and how incredible she was. Fortunately, I didn't and I couldn't be more grateful for that.

Some fond memories I have of Cheryl was playing 'POW.' Anytime she said the word pow! you fell to the ground and played dead. The more dramatic the fall the better her reaction would be. Only if I could hear that laugh of hers one more time... I also remember when she'd tell me to get out of her room. Anytime I visited or even when I was over at the house watching her. Man, if I didn't get out of her room the first time she told me, it was bad news bears. Many times she would shoo you out of her room and lock the door. In those cases, you would tell her you are calling Dr. Fenton and she'd immediately unlock the door. Another phrase she used a lot was 'Go home!' She said that to you whether she wanted you around or not. Most of the time to aggravate her I'd stay around even longer. ;) Another memory of her that I will always miss, but definitely will never forget is her breath-taking hugs. Literally you would have to catch your breath once she let go. Cheryl would squeeze you as hard as possible when giving hugs (if you got an extra hard squeeze, it always meant she really loved ya.)

Once high school hit, I got to spend even more time with her. Her dad being the athletic director at my high school meant that she tagged along with him to many sporting events. Being an athlete meant that I got to hang out with her at track meets, basketball games, etc. Along with these instances, I rode along with her to many football games (Pat always offered to drive my mom, my sisters and me.) During these sometimes long trips, she would watch many episodes of Life Goes On and we never failed to stop at a McDonald's before the game.

Pat, Cheryl, me and Coach T on my 18th birthday.

Throughout my high school years, Cheryl was battling cancer....let's just say she definitely kicked cancers ass, many times! She handled it very well. Many times doctors would say she wouldn't make it passed this age or that age...she not only proved many people wrong, but she proved a lot of doctors wrong! Cheryl was so content with life and the flow of things, that pain seemed to never be a problem. That was another great trait about her, I swear she was like a super human, that girl!

After high school, my time was somewhat shortened as far as visiting with Cheryl. I didn't have all of those opportunities to see her like I did in high school. Although I went to a local college, I spent a lot of time there my first two years. This took it's toll on me once I realized how much family time I was losing with not only my actual family, but Pat, Coach and Cheryl too. Towards the end of her life, I would try my best to visit them quite often. Even if it was just for five minutes, it was still nice to see them and see how Cheryl was doing.

The last week before she passed was probably the most difficult to grasp. Family and friends had been told many times by specialists that she wouldn't make it this far. When she came to the end of her life, it was hard to handle reality. Everything happened so quickly, it was a huge blur. I remembered the day of her passing to a T. My sister came in my room around 5 AM with tears in her eyes. 'If you want to see Cheryl one last time, you need to go to Coach T and Pat's right now,' she said. I woke up immediately, my heart racing...in complete shock. It was definitely not something I wanted to be woken up to. In disbelief, I rushed over next door trying to hold myself together. Coach, Pat and the rest of their family was there. My sister, mom and I went into her room to see her. We spent a couple of hours there, reminiscing on the memories we had with her. Before leaving, I went back into her room one last time to say my goodbyes. I stood beside her bed holding her hand and gave her one last kiss on the forehead.

Her visitation and burial were nothing but unique, just like her. Flowers, pictures and people crowded the high school gym. The amount of people who came to see her made me realize how many people she touched. Whether they had met her once or had been in her life for awhile, she had an impact on so many people. Cheryl's burial was really something special. She showed up at the cemetery taking her last ride on Tyson's bus. (The bus she rode to many sporting events.) It was a gloomy, chilly day; the sun wasn't out. While at the burial service, everyone gathered around for the service. Once he started to wrap things up, it began to snow...quite heavily. Not only did it snow, but as soon as everyone started to leave, the sun came out and the snow stopped. Everyone looked at each other and just smiled. We knew she was up there...that was our confirmation.

It has taken me a lot of thought and time into writing about Cheryl. This blog post does not do her justice, but I really felt like I needed to get these thoughts off my chest and write this. Words cannot express how amazing this women is and all of the positive changes she brought and still brings to this (sometimes) mad world. She will always be in our hearts and certainly never forgotten. And I do know one thing...that I cannot wait to see her smiling face once again when I make it to heaven someday.


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